Where do our self-limiting beliefs come from?
When working with my clients and with myself, the one thing we always end up tackling is our self-limiting beliefs. They seem to always be lurking below the surface ready to pounce whenever we get excited about doing something new and radical. They’re quick to tell us we can’t, we shouldn’t, we don’t deserve to.
When doing a Tarot reading, there is nowhere for those self-limiting beliefs to hide. The Tarot has a way of shining a light on them so that there is no escape and we finally have the clarity to address them head-on. But where are they hiding the rest of the time?
The root of all our beliefs
Every belief we have, whether it’s about ourselves or about the world in which we live, is rooted in the subconscious. They are created by events we have experienced or witnessed reaching as far back as our very early childhood. These events may not even seem that significant at first glance, but they are the catalyst for the creation of these self-limiting beliefs.
A lot of the time we think we need to have gone through something shocking or traumatic for it to imprint or change the way we think, but that’s not true. There are so many factors that need to be taken into consideration when thinking about how an event has imprinted on you. Some things to consider are:
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How old you were at the time, when we experience something in our very early years, our brains absorb it like a sponge, which is why therapists often start with your childhood and relationship with your parents.
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Where you were emotionally at the time of the event. For example, say someone with low self-esteem was insulted about being single, those people will hold on to and absorb the effects of that event in a different way than someone who is very confident and has much higher self-esteem. People with lower self-esteem may be less likely to brush it off or allow it to pass them by.
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Repeated experiences. If something keeps happening time and time again then the brain will start storing that away and keeping it as evidence for when a similar situation comes up. This can often happen when fear, embarrassment or trauma is involved and is something that CBT therapy addresses directly.
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“There is one grand lie – that we are limited. The only limits we have are the limits we believe.”
How can we dig out these beliefs to analyse them?
Trying to reach the subconscious on your own can be difficult because the subconscious is where your mind puts the things it doesn’t want you to consciously think about. It’s a bit like your conscious mind rocks up at an exclusive VIP club and then is instantly turned away by the bouncer. Your mind doesn’t want you to venture there.
Tarot is a great tool for accessing the subconscious mind because it forms a pane of glass between the conscious and the subconscious. You’re being supported and guided through the hidden world of the subconscious, rather than being left alone to wander into places you may not want to go. The cards reflect back to you what is happening in the subconscious so you can see what is going on from a safe distance. This means the mind puts up less of a fight to keep things from you because it feels safer.
Meditation is also a great way of relaxing and opening up the subconscious. It encourages the mind to loosen its grip and allows you to move through its many levels unencumbered. It can however take a bit of practice to be able to go deep enough, but finding a meditation teacher or following a guided meditation can make things a little easier.
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“We learn our belief systems as very little children, and then we move through life creating experiences to match our beliefs. Look back in your own life and notice how often you have gone through the same experience.”
Why do we need to address self-limiting beliefs?
Often these self-limiting beliefs are stopping you from reaching your full potential or keeping you from doing something that would be life changing. To be able to keep growing, keep living to our fullest and always expanding our awareness and perspectives, we have to tackle the things that are keeping us in place, which is often these self-limiting beliefs.
Some limiting beliefs are harder to face than others and its ok to put some of them aside if you don’t feel fully ready to tackle them. Like I said at the beginning, these beliefs can sometimes be rooted in trauma, so it’s best to pull at those when you have professional support such as a counsellor or therapist.
For those beliefs that are less sensitive, booking Tarot readings or exploring self-divination can be a great way to start the work. I’m always happy to help guide people through their journey of self-discovery, so if you’d like to work 1:1, fill in my Tarot booking form here.
