By now, you’ve probably heard all about self-limiting beliefs, but if you haven’t, here’s a very brief breakdown of what it means:
Self-limiting beliefs are subconscious beliefs that you have created, that stop you from doing what you want or need to do. Business-minded or entrepreneurial people wanting to build their own business in particular struggle with this.
The thing about self-limiting beliefs is that the root of them is not always what we think. Our mind never works in straight lines, it zigs and zags and jumps to conclusions. This means that even the smallest event can create a belief we have of ourselves.
For example, say you were in school when you were very young and another child told you that your drawing was rubbish. From that point on, the seed has been planted and it may not grow into ‘I can’t draw’ it might evolve and mutate into ‘I’m not a creative person’ or even a step further ‘I’m not good at anything’. This can also become things like ‘people will laugh at me behind my back if I try and do that’ or ‘I probably won’t be good at what I want to do so why bother trying?’. We never realise it at the time, but from this point on we have an emotional trigger, that clicks on whenever we are threatened with having to feel the way we felt in that moment. Our brain creates these beliefs in order to stop us from putting ourselves in a situation where we could possibly incite the same outcome.
Stop feeding your self-limiting belief monster
Do you see how the smallest seed can create the biggest self-limiting beliefs? This tiny voice in your head telling you that you can’t, gets stronger and stronger the longer you feed it. We feed it by denying ourselves the opportunity to try, agreeing with the ludicrous statements it creates for us and staying within our comfort zones.
Today is the day we stop letting the monster make the decisions though! With these seven handy tips, you can start to make positive steps forwards. Put up a fight and win against those beliefs that are holding you back.
1) Identify what your self-limiting beliefs are
First things first, we need to know what we’re fighting against. This can take a bit of time and a lot of self-awareness. We need to pinpoint what our self-limiting beliefs are and we do that by noting down everything the little voice inside is saying to us. Sit and think about why you’re not going out there and working towards your biggest goals. Don’t filter yourself, just let whatever needs to come up, come up and make a note of it.
2) Create conflicting affirmations
Once we’ve identified what our self-limiting beliefs are, we can then work on creating facts to contradict them. Take that list of beliefs you made in point 1 and create a sentence that contradicts that belief. So, for example, you may have:
‘I’m not skilled enough to become a photographer’ as your belief.
Then you need to contradict that belief with something along the lines of ‘I will be skilled enough to be a photographer in time’ or ‘I have the passion, drive and creativity to become a photographer’.
Say these affirmations to yourself every day in the mirror. The more you say it, the more you’ll believe it.
3) Do a self-dedication ceremony
I did something similar when I decided to become pagan and dedicate my time and energy to a more mindful and spiritual lifestyle. You basically tell the universe that you are willing and ready to put just as much effort into yourself as you do your work and loved ones.
We need to show those self-limiting beliefs that we’re serious about what we want and that they aren’t going to hold us back anymore because we have dedicated to ourselves completely.
Some perfect crystals for your ceremony are Lapis Lazuli for inner wisdom, Blue Onyx for higher consciousness and Carnelian for passion and motivation.
4) Prove yourself to yourself
If there is something you subconsciously believe you’re not good at, or that you ‘can’t’ do, then give it a go. Tell yourself it’s just this one time and see how you feel once it’s over. You might find that you actually do have a knack for it after all and that little voice won’t be able to tell you ‘no’ anymore.
5) Create a bucket list and an affirmation for each point
What would you do if you couldn’t fail? It’s a cliche question at this point, but it can be the ideal thing to get you thinking. Write down what it is you want to achieve, what you’re too scared to give a go and what you’d love to do before you kick the bucket.
Next, take that list and create an affirmation for each. So if you have a bullet point that says ‘I want to own my own business’ then your affirmation will be ‘I own my own business and I love it’.
Affirmations always work best when you word them as though they are already in your life.
6) Argue with the little voice
When that little voice pipes up, muster up all the sass you have in your body and tell it where to go. I love to tell my self-limiting beliefs where they can shove their opinion. Even if you have to argue with it out loud, let it know that you’re in control.
7) Journal using the ‘Why, why, why what’ method
I love the ‘Why, why, why, what’ method as it gets your brain thinking about the root of the issue. It’s not always an easy thing to do though, because our brain is keeping things in our subconscious to protect us. It doesn’t want us to be upset or brought down by past events, so instead it keeps them all locked away. But it’s these events that are causing the self-limiting beliefs, so if we can address them directly, then the beliefs dissolve away.
The ‘Why, why, why, what’ method requires you to take those self-limiting beliefs from point 1 and break them down time and time again until you’ve got a more concentrated outcome. It works a little like this:
Belief – I’m not skilled enough to be a professional photographer
Why do I think that?
Because I haven’t trained to become a photographer and I don’t have the same knowledge as professional photographers.
Why should that stop me?
Because clients want people that know exactly what they are doing and want professional pictures as a result and I don’t want to disappoint them.
Why do I feel I wouldn’t be able to deliver that?
Because I don’t have the confidence to present my work as a professional piece of work and I worry that clients will be unhappy with what I present to them.
What can I do to resolve this?
I could take an online course or even re-train as a photographer and build my portfolio in order to grow my confidence and present my work to potential clients.
The ‘Why’ questions are flexible, they should address the previous answers and get you thinking about why it is you have those beliefs. What emotions are behind them? On the surface, it always appears like a cold hard fact, until you dig a little deeper and realise you actually have a very emotional root keeping it stuck in your mind. You can see by the above examples that fear and a lack of self-esteem are the main emotional root of this belief, so what can we do now to address those emotions?
This technique can be tricky though, so if you need a little bit of help identifying what your self-limiting beliefs are, or what their emotional root is, then getting yourself a guidance tarot reading can be the perfect way to get you on the right track. Alternatively, here’s a little spread you can do for yourself with your own tarot decks.
Remember, I’m always on hand to help you fight against those self-limiting beliefs, so don’t be afraid to get in touch if you want to talk through things!
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