Breaking the need for control with The Emperor

I’m only 31 years old at the time of writing this blog and even I remember a time before our lives were ruled by technology and information was not available to us at the click of a button.

It’s only in the last 20 years, which is a fairly short amount of time, that technology has completely altered our way of life and the lens through which we see the world. Everything is instant now. Next day delivery, instant answers to our questions through Google and an expectation of instant responses from those we contact.

In a lot of ways it has made our lives easier and I’m not bashing technology, my entire career is based on the digital world, but it’s hard to ignore the fact that it has created a society of control freaks. I include myself in this. We have control of so much now, everything is customisable and when that control is taken away or not available to us, we can panic or feel the anxiety building.



Identifying our issues with control

I am someone who needs to be in control of everything, of my time, where my focus is, who gets to contact me, outcomes, you name it I need to control it. It’s only since taking on a more spiritual and witchy way of life that I’ve started to work on this and try my hardest to ease off the gas a little.

However, that need for control is usually a very subconscious problem that can be a little slippery to manage. Often we don’t even realise that it’s bubbling to the surface until we’re huddled in a corner rocking back and forth because our parcel didn’t arrive when the app said it would.

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The illusion of control makes the helplessness seem more palatable. And when that illusion is taken away, I panic.
— Allie Brosh – Hyperbole and a Half

This is where we can introduce The Emperor. A card that is filled with divine masculine energy, the need for control and have authority over everything. I notice this card a lot when I work with clients who own their own businesses. They often crumble in the face of the unknown because they have become so used to spinning all the plates at once. They struggle to release some of that control, even if it’s in their own best interest because attached to that need for control is a fear, a fear of everything breaking if they don’t always have their hands on the wheel.

Using The Emperor card to battle our inability to relinquish personal power

It’s a tricky subject ‘control’ because people tend to have different relationships with it based on their own personal experiences. It may be that there is some childhood trauma that is at the root of your need for control, it may be more recent trauma or it could be a learned response.

The need for control, if we use The Emperor correspondences to guide us, is an imbalance of the fire element, a big dollop of fiery Aries energy that is in full control of our actions, thoughts and feelings. More than anything though, our need for control comes from our basic human need for safety. If we are in control, then we can make sure we are safe, that everything is going to plan and nothing scary or unexpected will happen to us.

What The Emperor can do, is help us to find a way to feel safe, but understand and most importantly, accept the things we can and can’t control. He can help us do this by turning our attention to the stable things we have in our life instead of focusing on the things that are crumbling or cracking.

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May you find the strength of will and the grace of endurance to overcome every challenge.
— Lailah Gifty Akita, Think Great: Be Great!

An example of this would be if you’re facing the possibility of being let go from your job, you may automatically think about all the bills you’ll have to pay without an income, your mortgage, how you’ll put food on the table. What The Emperor does is swoop in and act as that voice of reason, that fire we have within us that keeps us alive. He shows us that we need to be more trusting of our own capabilities and trust that if the worst does happen, that scrappy, primal instinct to do whatever needs to be done to keep your head above water will kick in and keep everything afloat.

The Emperor in all of us

The Emperor card represents our basic instinct to stay alive. We all have him inside of us, it’s the same as a gazelle grazing in a field, one crack of a stick behind it and its Emperor instinct kicks in and away it goes. It’s the fight or flight energy and when we have too much Emperor in control, that’s when we can feel anxious and panicked.

What we have to do is learn to work with The Emperor, instead of trying to battle him into submission or simply lying down and allowing him full control. We have to understand why he is appearing, where his motivations are coming from and how we can work in tandem with him. We are using his energy to see that there is no one way to keep ourselves safe, that if one safe haven falls, we have the skills and ability to build or find a new one.

So, let’s see what we can come up with when we allow ourselves to dive into our own Emperor energy. Use these journal prompts to start using The Emperor to address your own control issues and needs, start to discover where they are coming from and how you could start to find a balance again.

  • What is it that I’m afraid to lose control of?

  • Why am I afraid of not having full control of these things? Why wouldn’t I feel safe if I didn’t have control of these things?

  • Are there any situations in my past where I did not have control of a situation and something bad happened? If so, how do you think this experience could be contributing to your current problems.

  • If you did release control of these things, what is the worst thing that could happen? Are these things realistically or statistically likely to happen?

  • List all the things that currently make you feel safe and secure. How many of things are in your control and how many rely on third parties or outside sources?

  • If you did release or lose control of your current situation, what would you do? What plans would you put into place? How would you navigate the situation?

The Emperor Card Meaning | Tarot Card Meaning

 

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The Emperor is the card of the divine masculine, it is a symbol of power, strength and authority. Often when The Emperor rears his head in a reading, there is a need to step up and take back control or flex your own authority.

He is also seen as the father figure in the major arcana, the yang to The Empress’ yin, or in Pagan traditions, the sun to The Empress’ moon. He is strict, abides by the laws and rules and can enforce his authority with ease.



Upright

When The Emperor appears right side up, he can represent a number of different properties, such as:

  • Leadership

  • Authority

  • Discipline

  • Divine Masculine

  • Control

  • Power

In the upright position, The Emperor is often a sign that there is a need to step into your power, to not be afraid to take or chase what you really want. Depending on the position, The Emperor can also represent someone else taking your power away from you, or blocking you from being able to be more authoritative. This could be a boss or even a controlling parental figure.

Reversed

In the reversed position, The Emperor can point towards our weaknesses in character or even our ego taking over. All the attributes of The Emperor upright are now flipped on their heads and turned inwards. Some reversed meanings for The Emperor are:

  • Stubbornness

  • Egotistical

  • Controlling

  • Authoritarian

  • Undisciplined

The Emperor is the master, the ruler of everything. I like to think of him as a figure such as Zeus, Henry VIII or Daenerys from Game of Thrones. In fact, she’s a great example of The Emperor moving from the upright to the reversed position over time.

Characters That Represent The Emperor

To help you get a better feel for The Emperor, here are a few characters from history and media that will help you understand the essence of The Emperor card.

  • Henry VIII – King of England

  • Daenerys Stormborn (Khaleesi, breaker of chains… you get the gist) – Game of Thrones

  • Zeus – Greek God

  • Alexander Hamilton – Hamilton

  • Walter White – Breaking Bad

  • Elizabeth I – Queen of England

  • Princess Leia/ General Organa – Star Wars

 

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Reading The Emperor in a spread

The Emperor is the opposite of The Empress, in that he is the authoritative leader who takes charge and is all about action rather than feeling. The Emperor has the same unmoving energy as a brick house or a large boulder. He does things on his own terms and so he can be quite a confronting energy to get in your tarot spreads. Let’s have a look at different ways we can approach this stoic energy of The Emperor when he makes an appearance in our readings.

As an invitation

When we read The Emperor as an invitation, it can seem like an invite that we are afraid to decline. He’s very forceful in his message and it can feel like more of a command than an invitation, but it’s offered in the vein of tough love, rather than manipulation or control.

For The Emperor, this invitation could be the following:

  • An invitation to explore your own personal strength and power

  • An invitation to see where you can exercise more control and authority

  • An invitation to explore your own capabilities and desires

  • An invitation to explore your divine masculine and see how you can use it more effectively

As sage advice

The Emperor is a big fan of dishing out advice. He can be a bit egotistical so the advice he offers comes from a very self-assured and confident place. When The Emperor offers you advice, it is always for your own good, even if it’s hard to hear. He can also highlight when you’ve taken his energy a bit too far in the other direction, causing you to be unyielding when you don’t have to be.

Some advice The Emperor may offer is:

  • To stop allowing people to manage your affairs, take control of your own stuff

  • Be mindful of when you are being stubborn, rather than simply standing your ground

  • Check in to see if you are making decisions based on your ego or using your intuition

  • Never give up your power to make others happy or soothe somebody else’s ego

As a lesson

The archetype of the father figure, which The Emperor is based off, is someone that relishes dolling out hard lessons. The Emperor wants you to learn the hard way and therefore he can often represent those difficult lessons we are faced with throughout our lives.

Some lessons that The Emperor may offer you are:

  • To not let anyone else take your power away from you

  • To be a leader but not a dictator, find a balance between authority and compassion

  • To identify the areas of your life where The Emperor energy is needed and where it can be put to one side in favour of more nurturing energy

  • Not everything will be done for you, at some point you’ll need to step up and take control of your own destiny

As a redirection

The Emperor as a redirection is a call to action. If you’ve been planning, strategising or just thinking about how to solve your problem or overcome your challenges, The Emperor appears to tell you it’s time to put in the work. He is an anti-procrastination card because he has no time for those that dilly-dally.

As a redirection, The Emperor could symbolise a need to:

  • Step up and take control of the situation

  • Check your ego and pride to see if they are standing in your way

  • Release your hold on situations you’ve been gripping tightly – this is especially important in the realm of relationships

  • Take on more responsibility for your own actions

In summary…

The Emperor may seem like a harsh card, but remember that his energy is always in service of you. The Emperor, like any of the tarot cards, wants you to succeed and thrive, he’s just a bit more direct in his approach. When you are faced with The Emperor card, it helps to also think about The Empress and consider how each card would view the problem or question you are asking about.